McCoy on the Enterprise
by I heart Star Trek
Summary: McCoy and what he does on the Enterprise. Some chapters may carry to the next, but some may also be unrelated. I am going to try to feature Spock and maybe get McCoy's insight on some of their "arguments". Comments are greatly appreciated.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

"Shit!"

"Doctor, is something the matter?" Nurse Chapel inquired.

"Damn right! Today's Friday, September 13!" Chapel shook her head at her CMO. He was one of the few people who still used the old Gregorian calendar, instead of Stardates.

Suddenly, the klaxons were blaring "Red Alert. All hands, battle stations. Repeat, red alert. Battle stations."

"What'd I tell you, Nurse?" McCoy growled. "One hell of a day. Get surgery ready. I'm sure as hell we're going to be in there." He stalked to the intercom and was going to call the bridge to see what was going on, but decided against it. He'd be useless up there, and would only be in the way. Despite what that pointy-eared, green-blooded hobgoblin thought, he had a purpose by going up there. To make sure that if Jim did something stupid, there was someone there to hold his crazy ass back. He barrelled into the turbolift and snapped "Bridge!" when the computer asked him where he wanted to go. McCoy charged onto the bridge and stopped dead in his tracks, staring at the mess of green and red pools that were rapidly growing on the floor.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

"Doctor McCoy to Sickbay. Bring me two stretchers STAT!"

"Bones, they'll be fine."

"I'm the doctor, not you Captain. I'll decide that." McCoy turned and saw two science ensigns hurry through the door with the portable bio-beds. "Took you long enough. These men are losing blood fast. Dammit don't just stand there! You, see all that green stuff? Try stopping it! He's bleeding, and it looks deep."

"Doctor, I am fine." Spock said, trying to keep his stoic expression in place.

"Hell you are. Or don't you know what that viscous green liquid is?"

"Get me a bandage."

"A bandage, sir?"

"Yes, a bandage! Something I can use to stop the bleeding!"

"Bones, here." Kirk pressed the gold material into his friend's hands. Geez, that man took every excuse he could to rip his shirt, even if it wasn't by accident.

"Jim, keep the pressure on the wound. Knowing Spock, he'll leave it off, and then not come to Sickbay. Actually, Spock, come here." As the Vulcan walked forward, McCoy suddenly pounced on him and stabbed him with a hypo. McCoy caught his friend and lowered him to the bio-bed. "Jim, take him down to Doctor M'Benga. And keep the pressure on that wound!"

"We're gone, Bones. Why don't you get Chekov on that other bio-bed and come with us?"

"Does anybody up here have something I can use to stop this man from bleeding to death?" McCoy hissed at the remaining bridge crew. Somebody pressed more gold material into his hands. Looking up, he saw a shirtless Hikaru Sulu sitting at the navigation console.

"As the Captain and First Officer are both gone, uh, Sulu you can have the conn. But get whosever next in line, uh, Scotty, I think, get them up here, stat! Can't believe I'm saying this, but someone; write me a report on whatever the hell happened!" And with that, McCoy got Chekov into the turbo and ran to Sickbay with his patient.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

As soon as McCoy got out of surgery, he went to check on Spock. Doctor M'Benga had operated on him, but as CMO, he felt obligated to make sure his patients were all okay. Well, maybe he just wanted to see that damn Vulcan and make sure he was alright. People said one thing, but the fact was different. Leonard McCoy considered the Vulcan to be his best friend, perhaps a closer one than Jim. Not that he'd ever admit it.

"Spock! What the hell do you think you're doing out of bed?"

"Alpha shift has started. I am due on the bridge."

McCoy brandished a hypo threateningly. "You will stay in Sickbay until I release you, Mister Spock." He went to the wall communicator, all the while keeping an eye on the First Officer. "Nurse Chapel, can you please come keep a twenty-four hour watch on Mister Spock, please? He thinks he is going to report back for duty and if he tries to escape you will use a hypo of, oh, I don't know, something to keep him unconscious for at least eight hours."

"I understand. I'll be there in a few minutes, Chapel out." As McCoy released the intercom, he turned around and smirked at Spock. "Don't underestimate me again, Mister Spock."

"Indeed I won't, Doctor." Suddenly, Spock heard a hissing hypo. "Doctor, I thought you were going to leave it up to Nurse Chapel as to whether or not to keep me unconscious."

"I lied." McCoy said gruffly. He then escaped to his office and locked himself in there for the rest of the day, telling everyone to stay out.


	4. Chapter 4

Drabble

**Chapter Four**

Bones McCoy wasn't a man to reflect back on his life. However, he was drunk and when he was drunk, he often did things he didn't normally. So, in his mind, he was going back to the days before Starfleet. Before the Academy, hell before Starfleet. Mostly, he'd think about Joanna or his father, the good memories. But sometimes, he thought about Jocelyn. Their life together. The way she felt against him. How she held his hand so tight when Joanna was born, he thought he might have to reconstruct all the bones and tissues, she was squeezing so hard.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

Doctor McCoy was having a bad day. It didn't help that it was only ten hundred hours ship time and the ship had been in two battles (really more skirmish than battle) with eighteen injured and four dead (all red shirts; this reminded him about that study he was going to do about why they died so much more frequently). A light tapping noise suddenly registered his attention. It took another minute for him to realize someone was outside his office. Probably Jim, he grumbled, wanting to have a drink or know about reports or something stupid like that. Didn't he realize that the CMO had better things to do?

McCoy got up and walked the short distance to the door, thinking dark thoughts about the Captain, and pressed the button to let whoever the hell was out there in. McCoy plastered his best Southern smile on his face and froze in shock when he saw that it was Spock.

"Well then, Mister Spock. What can your old country doctor do for you today?" He drawled in the style the crew had come to call 'Georgian Doc'. (If you asked him, the crew was losing its originality.)

"I would point out that there are debatable words in that sentence, Doctor McCoy; however doing so again would be illogical, and no doubt futile."

Jeez, ask the man a question and receive a lecture. "Spock," McCoy said, trying not to laugh, "What can I do for you?"

"I had merely thought that there was some type of logical pattern to your days. I was waiting for you on the Rec Deck Two." Spock raised an eyebrow. "Apparently, I was wrong to believe that a man as illogical as you followed any sort of pattern."

"Wait, but isn't it the middle of the day?"

"It is fourteen hundred hours. The captain has dismissed me from the bridge for one hour. He has ordered me to eat something and relax. I merely thought that as a doctor, you would be a logical person for me to 'relax' with."

McCoy was startled. He knew that Vulcans could not tell a lie, so what he said had to be true. "I suppose I can spare an hour from Sickbay." Suddenly, he remembered everything that had happened that day. Nothing positive had happened. His expression darkened.

"Doctor McCoy?"

Damn that green-blooded hobgoblin! Only Spock could ruin his depressing mood and replace it with one of amused annoyance that quickly. "I'm coming, Spock. And I swear, if you let me win, I'll have you in Sickbay faster than you can say cheese."

"Doctor, why would I say 'cheese'? It is illogical to simply say a word without meaning what its definition is." Spock said. McCoy laughed, his pessimism gone (for the most part).


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

Does religion matter? McCoy asked himself for what seemed like the millionth time in his life. Is there really a god out there, somewhere? A real god? It's completely possible that I've met him or her, without knowing it. What if that being on Pollux IV really was "God"? He had been one of who the Ancient Greeks had worshipped as a god come to earth. They had called him Apollo. There had even been space missions named after him – at least twenty of them.

There certainly hadn't been many god given miracles in his life. If there was a god, why couldn't he have gotten a little nudge into the right direction? For crying out loud, he was as good as guilty of murdering his own father. And he had sworn his Hippocratic Oath about saving life when possible. He had let his father die, merely weeks before a cure for the disease was found. If that wasn't murder, he didn't know what was.

Then there was when he lost Joanna in the court battle. He had told Jocelyn that he didn't care what happened to her after the divorce (come on, he wasn't stupid; he knew when his wife slept with another man, no matter what she thought). His daughter deserved someone who could show her the right way to live, he pleaded with the judge, not someone who consistently cheated on her husband, lied, and did who knows what else. However, his next act was to drive straight down to Starfleet and sign up as a cadet. In his ex-wife's eyes, that was immature and therefore proof that he couldn't handle responsibility and raising a child. If there was a god, they surely wouldn't let a child go to a slut of a woman who disgraced her family.

And what about all those unneeded deaths that happened onboard ship? Did god have it out for red shirts or something? Hell, almost every person who came injured to Sickbay wore a red shirt. Surely a god can't be prejudiced. Suddenly, the klaxons sounded and a red alert was called. No, he decided, a god wouldn't let all this fighting and war and deaths keep repeating itself. A god would let its people live happily. There would be no need for war, as every planet would have sufficient resources for its inhabitants. Then again, a god might want its people to fend for themselves. Who knew? McCoy just hoped that he would be able to patch up the latest batch of injured red shirts, without having to add any names to the list of deaths he kept hidden in his drawer. He kept the list as his own personal way of remembering each of those who died on his ship while he was Chief Medical Officer, for it was his job to patch them up and make them healthy again. Damn, why did life have to be so complicated? McCoy suddenly wished for the wide open Georgian blue sky. He thought about what it must have been like in the old days, without all this damned technology and interstellar wars and shit. But, he wouldn't trade his life for any other's. This was where he belonged.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

As Doctor McCoy entered Sickbay at the beginning of Alpha Shift that day, he heard crying coming from one of the nurses' offices. He followed the sound and stopped outside the door of the Head Nurse's office. "Christine?" He asked. "Can I come in?"

Nurse Chapel quickly dried her eyes. "Of course, Doctor." She replied, trying to keep her voice from shaking.

"What happened, Chris?" McCoy asked, concerned about his head nurse.

"Doctor?"

"Chris, what's wrong?" McCoy put on a gruff exterior, if only to try to protect himself, but it was slipping, seeing his friend like this.

"I swear, it's nothing, Len." She hiccupped. "I just probably embarrassed Mister Spock so that he can never associate with me again, out of protection for his professional reputation."

"He'll get over it." Screw his Hippocratic Oath, McCoy was going to hurt that Vulcan for every tear she cried.

"Don't do it, Leonard." Chapel said softly. McCoy swore under his breath. Why did she have to know him so well? "Please, just leave it alone."

McCoy regarded his Head Nurse thoughtfully. He respected her, and was glad their relationship went beyond the professional boundary.

"I'll be fine, Leonard. I swear." She held her hand up solemnly and burst into hysterical giggles.

McCoy stayed with her the rest of the day.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

A whining noise sounds and a beam of purple light is emitted. It misses the red shirt by inches and hits one of their opponents' own people. McCoy drops his phaser to the ground and races to the injured man. Kirk looks at McCoy as if to say 'he just tried to kill you, and now you're gonna fix him up'. McCoy glares back at the Captain; dammit he is a doctor, not a diplomat. Kirk shrugs and McCoy patches the man up. The rest of his people look up incredulously. Because of this one action, a treaty is formed.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

"So you have no idea what it is?"

"That is essentially what I said, Doctor."

McCoy shook his head. Of all the times for that Vulcan to be uncertain, it had to be now. Any other time, he would have teased Spock mercilessly about this, but due to extenuating circumstances, he couldn't. Extenuating circumstances being Jim going missing on an unknown planet (again) with no one accompanying him except a Security team (again), while Spock and himself were left on ship to worry about what the hell he was doing and whether or not he was going to make it back up here alive (again!)

"Well, why don't we," here McCoy spluttered before continuing, "transport down and see if he's dead?"

Spock raised an eyebrow at this. "The Captain left the conn with me, and he does not intend for that to 'bounce around this room like a ping pong ball'."

"You're using a metaphor?" McCoy asked incredulously. Now this would be something good to use as bait. Metaphors were very illogical things to use in speech.

"No, Doctor, I am simply quoting the Captain's exact words."

_Damn. That would have been perfect!_ Aloud he said: "Well, I'll take my own team and beam down."

"…"

"Spock, I'm a doctor. I do possess a logic centre in my brain. Is it not logical for a doctor to beam down if he suspects someone in the landing party is injured?" McCoy could see the Vulcan was weakening. "Spock," he said gently, "we need to get the Captain back onboard the ship. If I recall this correctly, the last time something like this happened, he found a girl who did some witch voodoo stuff and made Jim forget everything. He thought he was part of their tribe and he _married_ her. She had a child, because of him!"

"That, is true, Doctor."

"So, I'll go down there and you stay here and figure out if that thing is intelligent or not."

"Logical."

"Well, good luck, Spock." Spock looked quizzically at the Doctor.

"Luck?"

"Never mind. Just, figure out what it is and I'll get Jim's ass back here and strapped down in Sickbay." McCoy stepped into the transporter and Spock watched as Mister Scott scrambled the doctor's molecules onto the planet below.

"Good luck, Doctor." He said quietly.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

"Nurse Chapel. Surgery. Now!" McCoy shouted over his shoulder. He quickly stripped down and put on his surgical gear before bolting into surgery.

"Doctor." Chapel rushed into the room, already prepared for anything.

"Get me some of that T negative blood Spock gave for emergencies." Dammit, Spock. You should be dead by now. As soon as you're fit for duty, I'm going to kill you.

"That would be a very illogical thing to do." A thin voice rasped.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

McCoy started. "You are in surgery, Spock. You've lost half the blood in your body. The dosage on the hypo was enough to keep you fully unconscious for two days. Why the hell are you awake?"

"Because I am fit for duty, and it is illogical for me not to be on the bridge at this moment."

Nurse Chapel came back in the room, carrying the blood just in time to see the Doctor hit his patient over the head. "Doctor." She said worriedly.

"Oh, Nurse. He was awake, so I had to put him back under somehow. The hypo was empty so I struck him unconscious."

Chapel nodded. "Here is the blood." She placed it on the table and, at the CMO's nod, injected Spock with just under the lethal dosage of UN-conscious, the leading brand of painkiller _guaranteed_ _to keep your patient under_. If this didn't work, McCoy thought, I'm going to sue them.

"If he wakes up, give him the minimum dosage, Nurse." Chapel nodded.

McCoy restarted the operation. He skillfully inserted the tube into Spock's side, near his heart (stupid Vulcan physiology) and pumped the life giving substance into his best friend. "I swear Spock, if you die; I'm going to kill you." Chapel heard the doctor mutter angrily.

Later, McCoy was filling out the necessary paperwork that went with Spock's operation. A knock sounded at his door, and grateful for the distraction, he answered. "Jim." He half-sighed and tried to smile.

"How is he?"

"I'm not sure. He still hasn't woken up."

"Bones?" McCoy knew his friend was concerned and shook his head.

"It's too early to know. Jim, he woke up halfway through. He shouldn't have woken up for two days yet, and that was the original dosage. Then, I hit him and knocked him out." McCoy shrugged, not too pleased with the way he had handled the operation. Someone tapped on the door.

"Spock, what the hell are you doing up?"

"Request permission to report to duty."

"Request denied. Now get back to the bio-bed." As Spock started to head back, McCoy yelled after him, "No, come here. I want you where I can keep an eye on you. In my office. Now."

"Captain." Spock nodded his head respectfully towards his superior as he entered the CMO's office.

"Spock. We talked about this, remember? When we're off-duty, it's"

"Jim." Spock nodded somberly.

"Hey, Spock, since you're calling Jim by his first name off-duty, you better start doing that with me too."

"Why, Doctor?"

"Because I asked you to, dammit!" McCoy took a deep breath. "I'd appreciate it," he said slowly, "I like it when my friends call me by my nickname. I do consider you a friend, you green-blooded hobgoblin."

"Yes, Doctor."

"Dammit Spock! My name is Bones. I'd like you to call me that off-duty. Unless that makes you feel uncomfortable." Either he's going to call me Bones, which is a nickname people who feel friendship with me use, or… or…or…I'll get him in for a physical every day for the rest of his life!

"That would be illogical, Doctor."

"I don't care! I am an illogical person, aren't I?" McCoy could almost see Spock agreeing with him, when…

"Very well, Bones."

McCoy ran a scan on the Vulcan. "You're fit for duty."

Spock raised an eyebrow. "This soon, Doct…Bones?"

"You wasted so much energy illogically arguing with me about calling me 'Bones' that the time flew by. Now get up to the bridge."

Surprising everyone, Spock stayed with his friends another hour, using the doctor's nickname liberally.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

_Medical Log, Stardate…Screw this. It's November 26, which Jim informed me is National Cake Day. I recommended he skip the cake today and he asked me what kind of person he would be if he didn't celebrate national holidays. I could think of a few answers to that question. Especially as to why he in particular should not celebrate this holiday._

McCoy sighed. Dammit Jim! If you could just stick to your goddamn diet for once, you could eat a piece of cake on National Cake Day! It sure as hell wasn't his fault his captain was slightly overweight (by five pounds) and kept finding different food holidays, insisting that he should eat whatever food the holiday was for.

Grinning, McCoy had a brilliant idea and went over to Engineering to enlist Scotty's help.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

McCoy walked to the captain's favourite mess hall, knowing that he would be there by now as it was Alpha shift's lunch break.

"Hey, Jim-Boy!" He greeted the captain enthusiastically.

"Bones," the captain replied warily. He looked even more confused when McCoy delivered a large piece of cake right at the captain, who looked up quizzically. "Is this supposed to be funny, Bones?"

"Not at all. It's for you, and I'm going to let you enjoy it before I tell you what's in it." McCoy smirked at this, knowing that it would put Jim off eating it. He folded his arms and started a conversation with Scotty, waiting for the captain to taste the cake.

Kirk tasted it. "Bones, now I know something's wrong. It tastes completely normal."

"Happy National Cake Day, Jim. Now, do you want to finish it or do you want to know what's in it?" McCoy grinned as Jim started eating it as fast as he could, to stop the doctor from putting it away.

"Okay, Bones. I'll bite. What's in it?" Kirk asked as he put the plate aside and grimaced as McCoy started rambling off vitamin this and protein that and this element and that and who knows what else. He smiled as Jim's expression rapidly changed to one of confusion. "Jim, it's chock full of vitamins and minerals. And weight loser. And…" he dragged it out, "a stimulant that's going to give you a static shock until you get into the gym and exercise. And lose five pounds."

McCoy grinned at the Captain's horrified expression.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

"McCoy to _Enterprise_. One to beam up." McCoy flipped shut his communicator and closed his eyes so he didn't have to see the massive graveyard spread all around him. _Such_ _a_ _waste_, he thought miserably. A whole, previously unknown culture had killed itself rather than try and greet the newcomers, who gave every impression of being a civilized people. McCoy didn't even mind the molecule scrambling transporter, so saddened by the sights below.

"Bones, how are the…" Kirk's voice trailed off as McCoy stepped off the platform. "Bones, what's wrong?"

How could McCoy even begin to describe what he had seen? He was a doctor, not a diplomat. Perhaps if someone else had been in charge of the landing party and if someone had gone with him (not just the two Security guards, Delaynia Fjordicana and Bob Lee; Lieutenant Fjordicana had been killed instantly by one of the natives and Ensign Lee had been shot down with a rainstorm of arrows. Only McCoy had been spared, and only because he had made a sign of surrender before the would-be captors. After he surrendered, the man made a choking noise and died instantly. The rest followed suit and not even the most advanced methods of resuscitation had worked.

"They're…they're dead, Jim," he choked out. "Dead, yet there's no reason medically possible for that to have happened. At the same time they died, I tried to communicate that I would surrender to them and then they choked to death."

"Where are my Security guards?"

"They're dead too. Lieutenant Fjordicana was killed instantly when we beamed down by a native. Ensign Lee was…he was pursued by some of the inhabitants and shot by a flurry of arrows. I surrendered before they had the chance to do the same to me." The older man was visibly shaken by what he had witnessed. "Jim," he moaned. "Dammit, Jim. You should have sent a diplomat down, not an old country doctor like me."

"Lieutenant Commander McCoy, I order you to tell me exactly what happened. Go to your office and write me a full report."

"Aye, sir." Perhaps this will help me sort out the confusion in here, McCoy thought hazily as he slogged to Sickbay. Should get a stimulant so I don't fall asleep and forget some important detail. Cortropine should work. Gonna need something very strong. As he walked to his office, he briefly saw the ground come up from the sky and hit him in the head. McCoy fainted.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

"Doctor McCoy." A soft voice full of concern filled his head.

He shook his head, trying to clear it and looked around, trying to see who was speaking and who Doctor McCoy was.

"Doctor?" The voice sounded worried now. Then, "Leonard, please answer me."

He blinked. In front of him was a beautiful, blonde woman wearing a short, light blue dress. "Hey, there, beautiful." He drawled.

The woman stared for a minute, and then was back to being business-like. "What's your name?" She asked quietly.

"My name? Why it's…" He trailed off. "I, I don't know." He sounded confused and disoriented by the fact.

"Do you know who I am?"

"No…" He was starting to be suspicious. Should he know who this gorgeous woman was? He knew he liked her, but something in the way she looked was familiar, as if they were great friends or something. But he could have sworn he had never met her before.

"I'll be back in a minute," the woman promised him. "I'm going to bring you a few visitors. I want to know if you recognize anyone."

"Wait. Do I know you?" But the woman with the blue eyes didn't answer. "Wait!" He cried desperately. "Please!" The woman returned with what could only be considered an entourage. She introduced each person in turn.

"I am Nurse Chapel. This is Captain Kirk, Mister Spock, Mister Scott, Mister Sulu, Mister Chekov, and Miss Uhura." He felt the nurse scrutinizing him. These people seemed somewhat familiar, yet he could have sworn he had never met them before. He nodded to each of them in acknowledgment.

"Hello." He drawled. "Captain?"

"Yes, Bo-sir?"

"Wait, what were you about to call me? I may not know you but I know that name…"

"Bones."

"How do you know that name? The only person who ever called me that was…somebody named Spock."


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

Bones turned and looked directly at Spock. "That's what Spock called me," he repeated. Spock's eyebrow couldn't fly up fast enough.

"Indeed, Bones." The Vulcan murmured. Then louder, "if you would excuse the Captain and me, Bones, that would be much appreciated."

"Of course, Spock." The doctor looked at the First Officer fondly, as if they were the best of friends. Kirk followed Spock out the door.

"Spock, how is it that he…" Kirk trailed off there, unsure of how to put his best friend's condition.

"I am unsure. It is my theory that the doctor is undergoing some type of memory loss."

"But he knows who you are. What exactly happened on the planet?"

"The only person who knows is Doctor McCoy. He beamed down alone with two Security guards, who both died on the surface. If you would permit a mind meld, Captain."

"Only if you think it necessary."

"I do, sir. The doctor is a valuable and integral part of this crew. Not preventing his loss when there is a chance to would be illogical."

"I knew you would find some logical reason for this," Bones said. The two men looked up in surprise.

"How did you know this, Bones?"

"You're a walking computer, no?"

"No, Bones, I am a Vulcan. Would you allow me to join our –"

Bones looked at Spock suspiciously. "Do you want to pick through my brains?"

"I would not have put it in such crude terminology; however, that is essentially what I am going to do. A mind meld is different in that –"

"I know what a mind meld is, Spock." Bones said hesitantly. "Go for it."

Spock raised an eyebrow even higher, but placed his hand over the pressure points to begin the meld. Kirk quietly backed out of the room to give them some space.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

Bones was travelling backwards through time. Memories of long forgotten landing parties, Academy parties, fights with Jocelyn (who the hell was Jocelyn?), Georgia, camping, and so many other things he had forgotten. _Spock!_ He called out mentally. _I remember! Is Jim…_Bones trailed off.

_You have recovered all your memories, or so it appears._ Spock said.

_It seems like it. Spock?_ Bones said hesitantly.

_Yes?_

_I guess I was kind of confused. It was Jim who nicknamed me 'Bones'._

_Yes, it was he who gave you that name._

_Damn it. I guess I've hurt his feelings pretty bad, what with not knowing who he is, and thinking that you were the one who gave me __**his**__ nickname._

_Do not worry about it, Doctor. He understands, or will. He was hurt by circumstances, nothing you did was intentional._

_Right._

_I am going to exit the meld now. I want to know if you still remember everything after._

_Sure, Spock._

Slowly, Spock withdrew from the doctor's mind. "Doctor McCoy?"

"Yes, Spock. I remember. Jim?" Kirk looked up, his face a mask. However, Bones could see the pain in his eyes. "Jim, I'm sorry."

"Bones?"

"Jim, I, I was confused. Something was done to my head and I had temporary partial amnesia. I could give you the technical name for it, but you wouldn't understand." McCoy said sarcastically, messing with his friend.

"Bones." Kirk repeated, his face breaking into a restrained smile. "Bones, it wasn't your fault. Don't blame yourself."

"Isn't that my line?" McCoy drawled back good-naturedly.

"I suppose it is." Kirk replied as Alpha Shift ended. "Bones, why don't you come down to my cabin where we can, uh, discuss this."

"How about my office? I got a brand new prescription I'd like to test on you."

"Alright." Kirk agreed, trying to hide his broad grin. "Mister Spock, you have the conn. The rest of you, get back up to the bridge!"


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen**

"Dammit Jim!" A very livid Bones McCoy stormed off the turbolift. Everybody quickly focussed on their stations, McCoy noted in some distant, rational section of his brain.

"Hi Bones!" Jim said with obviously false cheerfulness.

"Oh, don't give me that rubbish Jim!" McCoy said angrily. "You were supposed to be in Sickbay over an hour ago." Jim quickly gave an order to Sulu, trying to ignore the doctor's tirade. "Do I have to declare you unfit for command? Is that how I have to get you into Sickbay? It's not like I want to perform an autopsy, dammit! It's just a routine physical!"

"Later, Bones." The captain brushed him off. McCoy suddenly smiled. Confused, the captain stared at him. "Bones?"

"Mister Spock, if you would." McCoy gestured at the First Officer, who stood up and walked to the centre chair. McCoy had gone to Spock and coerced him into backing him up if Jim refused the physical.

"Captain, under Paragraph 5 of Section C, Part 2, Sub-Section 9 of List 18 in Lines 23 -24, Starfleet procedure dictates that if command personnel refuse to follow a direct order related in any way to health, then they may be: hiding something, being impersonated, performing unauthorized experiments on themselves or something equally dangerous. Take action by relieving the officer of duty." Spock quoted.

"Spock," Kirk pleaded. However, McCoy knew the Vulcan would not relent and let the Captain have command until he was done in Sickbay.

"Sorry, Jim." McCoy tried not to laugh.

"Fine!" Kirk surrender. "Spock, if I'm not back in two hours, come after me." McCoy had predicted this also and was not surprised when the Vulcan merely raised an inquisitive eyebrow at the Captain's request.

"Lieutenant Uhura, please contact Lieutenant Riley and have him man the navigations console. Mister Chekov, if you would take the science station." Kirk stepped into the turbolift, defeated. McCoy watched Spock move to the Command Chair through the closing doors. McCoy grinned. Finally, it was payback time for all those times that Jim had stuck him in the transporter during an away mission.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

Chris Chapel entered her CMO's office cautiously. Len hadn't been himself lately and she was worried about him, not that she would ever admit it. Something was going on with him and she was determined to find out what it was. "Len?" She queried, looking around the small room.

"Chris!" Len emerged from under a pile of PADDs. "What can your old country doctor do for you, today?" He drawled.

Chris shook her head. "It's not what my old country doctor can do for me, it's what I can do for him," she said, carefully watching Len's face for any change in his expression. She noted a subtle change in his facial muscles, but otherwise, his expression was completely controlled.

"I'm fine." Len brushed off her concern.

"Len, you're not fine. C'mon, Len, please talk to me." Chris begged him. The grouchy old CMO shook his head. Chris took a deep breath and said very quickly: "Lenifyouwon'ttellmewhassthematterI'."

Len frowned. "What's that, Chris?"

"I'll have the captain declare you unfit for duty." Chris repeated, determined to figure out what Len's problem was.

Len sighed. He knew Chris and she wasn't going to give up until she knew what was bothering him. "Today's the anniversary of the day I met Jocelyn." Len didn't say anything else, but that was enough for Chris to know exactly what was going on.

"Well, that's a great excuse to hide under a pile of paperwork!" Chris said sarcastically. Oh no, she thought, I've been hanging around a depressed CMO for too long. I'm starting to sound like him!

"Please, leave me alone, Christine. I've got work to do." Len moaned, throwing a PADD so that it just missed her face. She wondered if he had missed on purpose, and thought he probably had.

"No way. We are going to go have dinner right now. It is past eighteen hundred standard hours and you haven't left this office since at least seven hundred. That's too long to work without a break. Are you _trying_ to kill yourself by overworking? You've been in here twelve hours nonstop. Now, if you don't come with me, I'll drag you to the Mess Hall and force you to relax!" Chris finished with a huff.

Len shook his head. Chris sure was pushy. Sometimes, she was worse than he was. "Fine," he surrendered, "I'll take a break." That ought to satisfy her.

"Nu-uh. You're having dinner and then going to bed if I have to get Mister Spock to give you a neck pinch." Chris threatened.

"Fine," Len acquiesced. "I'll have dinner and then let you personally escort me to my quarters. Fair?"

"Okay," Chris said as she discretely slipped a hypo filled with sleeping powder into her pocket. "Let's eat."


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty**

McCoy hated Jim right now. He didn't care it was illogical. He knew that it wasn't Jim's fault, but still. He had to blame someone. If Jim had never tried flirting with the native female, she wouldn't have gotten curious about humans. If she hadn't been curious, she never would have followed Ensign Pierman. If she had never followed Ensign Pierman, her mate would never have kidnapped Christine. Why had Chris gone on the landing party? He had gone down as medical officer. They didn't need two medics on the planet. And Chris hadn't beamed back up in the transporter beam. Sure, he was the annoying, bothersome, cantankerous, occasionally drunk, excitable, freaky, grouchy, hateful, irritable, lemon mouthed, mad, niggling, oppressive, personal, quirky, random, ah, _special_, technology hating, er, _unusual_, vehement, wacky, yelling, zany Chief Medical Officer of the _USS Enterprise_, but he still cared about every single person on the crew. Especially those in his medical department. Like Christine.

He took the lift to the bridge and morosely stood at the rail by the science station. McCoy looked confusedly at the Vulcan's viewer. "Whatcha doing, Spock?" He drawled slowly, being sure to catch Spock's attention. The Vulcan turned.

"I am attempting to locate Nurse Chapel's and Ensign Pierman's positions on the planet." Spock replied, short, concise, and to the point. McCoy frowned.

"Was she carrying a communicator? I thought she just had the tricorder." McCoy hadn't seen her carrying a comm unit, but he might have missed it.

"You are correct, Doctor. It is my theory that if the Nurse or the Ensign is utilising the tricorder, I may be able to isolate the waves emulating from it and isolate their locus."

McCoy groaned. "In Standard, please."

Spock raised his eyebrow, "That was in Standard, Doctor. However, I will attempt to 'dumb it down' for you. If one of them is using the tricorder, I may be able to pick out the waves that it emits and pinpoint their position."

"Thanks, Spock." McCoy said sarcastically. He stared at the viewer, wishing he was in Sickbay yelling at Chris to get him more hypos or something stupid like that. Spock didn't reply and McCoy supposed that the Vulcan had gone back to scanning stuff or something at the science station. (A/N I got a real phrase of alliteration or whatever in here; for once). He hovered behind the Captain's chair for a while, watching the viewer. He heard Kirk give orders and was very startled when the image of the planet below changed to one of a generic star field. "Captain," he said slowly, keeping his voice even. "Where are we going?"

"New orders just came in. There're reports of a Romulan ship patrolling the border, making contact with one of the neutral planets. We have to make certain they don't take it over."

McCoy's scowl deepened. "And what about Ch– Nurse Chapel? You're not going to leave her stranded on that planet." His last statement was not a statement, it was an order.

"Bones," the Captain said carefully, "we're going to be gone for three days. After the _Excalibur_ meets up with us, we'll be free to come back here to locate the Nurse."

He stared at this Captain, incredulous. "Three days? She could be dead by then, for all we know."

"It's a risk we'll have to take." The Captain said. McCoy could see the pain in his eyes, but brushed it aside. The Captain he knew was a risk-taker, someone who would stall for two months to get a member of his crew back from a planet. Not someone who would abandon his crewmember.

McCoy left the bridge, heading to Sickbay to grab some hypos, his tricorder, med scanner, and an extra shirt. Then, he headed to ship's stores. Finally he went to the Transporter Room.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty – One**

*Jim's POV*

"Captain, I was under the impression that the _Enterprise_ was leaving orbit immediately." Spock said, his voice hinting confusion.

"We are, Mister Spock." Jim heard his friend's confusion and walked over to the science station. "Why do you ask?" Jim was truly curious now. Spock never asked a question for no particular reason.

"Was a beam-down to the planet authorized?" Now Jim was getting worried.

"No." He said shortly. "Lieutenant Uhura, connect me to the Transporter Room." Who the devil would have disobeyed his orders and beamed down to the surface when they were about to leave? Suddenly, the answer dawned on him. "Lieutenant, do you have them?"

"Aye, sir. Lieutenant Kyle on the screen." The starfield dissolved to be replaced by the Transporter Chief's image.

"Lieutenant Kyle, did you just beam someone down to the planet?" Jim skipped the formalities and got directly to the reason he wanted to talk to the Lieutenant.

"Aye, sir." The Englishman affirmed. He was a little perplexed, Jim could tell.

"Who was it?"

"Why, Doctor McCoy, of course." Kyle said, his voice starting to hint concern. "Captain, was he unauthorized to do so?"

"I'm afraid so, Lieutenant." Jim said gently. "Don't worry, I'm not going to hold you responsible for this. You were only following the orders of a senior officer. But when I get my hands on the doctor…" Jim trailed off, unsure what to say as he would probably invite Bones to have some brandy and celebrate that he was alright.

"I see, sir. Had I known, I would never have done so." Kyle was obviously trying to reassure Jim of his innocence.

"Yes, I know, Lieutenant. That's all. Lieutenant Uhura," he motioned her to disconnect them, she quickly complied. "Mister Chekov,"

"Aye, sir?"

"Plot course to Janus III. Starfleet's got reports of Klingons on that planet, and since it's close to Janus VI, where the Horta live, the Fleet's worried that they'll be taken over. They don't seem to understand that the Horta are intelligent, not simply sentient rocks."

"But, vhut about Doctor McCoy, sair?" Chekov asked, his accent growing thicker to mask his worry.

"That's an order, ensign!"

"Aye, sir." Chekov's fingers danced over his control pad. "Course plotted."

"Ahead full, Mister Sulu. Mister Spock, you have the conn." Spock inclined his head in acknowledgement and Jim walked to the turbolift, automatically saying 'Sickbay' when the computer asked for his destination. He was halfway there when he realized there would be no one in Sickbay for him to talk to because Bones was on that planet. "Deck five," he told the computer crossly.


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: Imo is pronounced E-Moe.

**Chapter Twenty – Two**

"McCoy to Chapel, come in Chapel." McCoy growled into the communicator. Unsurprisingly, there was no reply. He looked out and saw a town a few miles away. McCoy decided to walk there and see if anyone had seen Chris. As he neared the settlement, he noticed it wasn't nearly large enough to be a town; it was a village at best.

The natives looked suspiciously like overgrown tribbles with legs. "Hello," he said as the natives looked up curiously at him. "I am McCoy. What's your name?" The native nearest him must have understood because she replied:

"Imo."

"Well, hello there Emo." McCoy said amicably. "I'm looking for someone. She has yellow hair and is wearing a blue dress. Have you seen her?"

"Imo." Imo repeated. McCoy sighed, as he realized that that wasn't her name and she didn't really understand him.

"Female," he said. "Blue and yellow." Suddenly, Imo's eyes light up with excitement, all seven of them. Imo started gesturing and walked away. McCoy, caught off guard, ran after her.

"Imo!" He called after her.

"Imo?" Her infliction changed and McCoy nodded. "Imo!"

Half an hour later: "Chris!" McCoy shouted in relief. Christine looked up, startled. She was surrounded by what looked to be larger versions of Imo. McCoy supposed they were adults. Their fur varied in colour, much like how humanoid's hair colour varied.

"Imo! Imo imo imo i-MO!" They chattered excitedly.

"Leonard?" Chris asked, her brow furrowing. "What are you doing here?"

"Long story short, I beamed down here to look for you," McCoy replied.

"Captain Kirk…"

"Did not authorize this. However, if I'm court-marshaled, it'll be my fault. I decided to disobey direct orders. Not you. How're you, Chris?"

"Surprisingly, fine." She said. McCoy ran his medscanner over her and looked at the results. She seemed fine, but –

"When we're back on the ship, you're getting a complete physical and mental check."

"Mental, Len?"

"Well, you'll do the mental exam on me," a grin broke through McCoy's hard face. "I must be insane for coming down here.

Christine gave a quivery laugh at her grouchy CMO's attempt at humor. "I don't know about that, Leonard."

McCoy flipped open his communicator. "McCoy to _Enterprise_." But only static reached his ears. "Must be out of range," he muttered. "Good thing I brought this down with me." He pulled a canvas tent out of his bag. "Good thing the 'Fleet believes in being prepared."

"Starfleet does, or you do, Doctor?" Christine said, hiding a smile.

"Well, maybe the 'Fleet doesn't mention it specifically…" McCoy trailed off, as he didn't know how to phrase his answer. Christine only laughed and shook her head. She rummaged through McCoy's bag and pulled out two tricorders.

"Since we're stuck here until further notice, we may as well pick up some more information." She suggested. McCoy nodded his agreement. He took the tricorder she passed him and turned it on. They walked amicably for a while before encountering a small village. "What do you think, Len? Should we talk to the natives?"

"They don't understand Standard and their language seems to consist of only one word; 'Imo'. They are primitive, and I believe that the Prime Directive is in order here." McCoy said. "Perhaps if we simply observed…"

Christine nodded in agreement. "We don't want to interfere in the development of this culture."

"Imo?" One of the smaller Imos (for lack of a better name) quietly inquired. "Imo imo imo iMO." McCoy unconsciously raised an eyebrow at this behavior and Chris stifled a laugh, not wanting to offend her friend, but she thought that he resembled Mister Spock when he did this. "Imo!"

"Imo," McCoy started.

"Imo imo imo imo." They jabbered.

"Imo," he repeated, firmly. The Imos turned around.

"Iiiiimo?" Christine couldn't help it; she started to giggle. Then, when she realized that the tricorder was still on, she laughed even harder.

"Christine?" Len inquired worriedly. "Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm fine. Maybe a little hyper, but otherwise normal."

"What your ole country doctor prescribes is rest, now, y'hear?" McCoy dared her to contradict him. Surprisingly, she mock saluted him, to which he replied: "At ease, soldier!"

"I'm a nurse, not a soldier."

"Right now, we're on shore leave, y'hear. And these Imos are our only friends to share it with. Let's relax a bit until Jim comes back for us."


	23. Chapter 23

Final Chapter

Leonard McCoy shook his head. "Damn it Jim! Why'd you accept that promotion? Now Spock'll probably be promoted to Captain, and _that's_ gonna be real strange, standing behind him, instead of to the side!"

Jim eyed his best friend suspiciously. "You don't have to be on the bridge. It was your decision, not the Fleet's, to post a doctor on the bridge."

"Yeah, well, this way we save time if someone gets critically injured," McCoy replied waspishly. Jim simply shrugged his shoulders and went back to staring at McCoy's office walls. Things were about to change on this ship very soon…


End file.
